A tough round of chemo

This has been a really tough round of chemo this time. hour to hour I am not sure how I am going to feel. I feel so badly for not understanding when the elderly say they are just worn out, I know what they mean now. I can go from great to no energy, lay down or pass out in an hours tme. I am hoping this goes away soon, like it usually does. I hope it is the chemo working, killing off the cancer cells. I am experiencing a slight pain in my left side, feels like a pain you get when you have been running. I have tried walking, sitting laying down, and rotating sides and it just seems to be hanging in there. Not horrible pain, but uncomfortable.

Eating just isn't fun anymore, I remember when I was my heaviest at 181 pounds and was completely addicted to food, I loved food, that's how I got to be so heavy! I think I am hungry now for something but after a few bites, it just tastes bad. I am also growing oh so tired of not being able to drink anything cold. Water is getting really boring, thank goodness for the invention of juice boxes. They taste pretty good at room temperature. You should hear the conversations I have had with waitresses at restaurants when I ask for room temperature water... so funny, when they look at me like I am from Mars and proclaim, no it comes out cold. I have learned just to smile and ask if they could maybe microwave it for me, and explain that I have cold sensitivity from dental work...

I noticed this morning that my toes are starting to peel, I have read that could happen from the oxalyplatinum. I have been told they take many people off of it early because of the symptoms, but as I told my Dr, I will live with numb, tingly feet and hands if it will kill off the cancer, I happily make that trade off, but I wonder will I go past the point of no return with it?

Still no word from the surgeon, I am starting to get annoyed, I wonder if they are laughing, thinking how could someone be referred for surgery with so much cancer or are they looking at the possibilities. I hope it's the latter.

I have been printing labels and getting everything ready for candle parties, I am so glad I still have a role in the business, it gives me purpose. I need purpose. Things are really starting to take shape for grubbyland and I couldn't be happier. My sister is becoming quite the candle maker, she is so awesome for doing this. I think she must be crazy sometimes, but I also think she is having fun and am so thankful for her taking over my biz.

Ok, I am rambling now, but whatelse do I have to do??? Thanks for the comments on my last post Barb and Jackie, you gals are so awesome!