Well you long term followers of this blog might remember last year at this time, when I was pronounced the pool boy and promptly fired a few weeks later. Tami was so into the care of the pool, she knew what chemicals needed to be added when, heck we would have the water tested at the pool place, they would tell us what we needed and Tami would scoff at them when they turned their back cuz she knew better, and she did. Here we had this woman, getting her butt kicked by Chemo out there scrubbing the pool not cuz I wouldn't do it, but because she had to do it herself, that's just who she was.
So I opened the pool this weekend, it opened to a slightly green tint, after one night of the pump running it was clear as a bell. I had scrubbed the heck out of it, shocked it and was all prepared to scower Tami's computer to find all her pool links to see what else I needed to do but so far it seems pretty good. I will test it again in the morning but so far its come inline pretty fast.
Beyond that I guess I am doing ok, I still have horrible bouts of guilt about everything, but I suppose that is normal. I pretty much have settled into the fact that I wont be getting much better anytime soon. The group is still pretty good. I think about Tami non-stop. I dunno, it still doesn't seem real most days. I am not sure it ever will. I been in heavy denial since August 2007, I really haven't found away out of that yet.
Tomorrow (Sunday) Clinton church is doing a memorial service for people who have passed away over the last few months. I told Tami I would go, so I will go, probably by myself, but that's ok, I am learning how to be by myself. I did call up Sarah (and invited her and Josh to a movie) and my parents and told them I got the reciept for my citizenship forms, just cuz I dont have someone to go home and tell, its still feels nice to be able to tell someone that something happened in my life even if I think now the people I am telling are not all that interested in everything I have going on. As a side note, waitresses seem to take better care of you when you are alone, so there is a bonus there I guess.
Psychic Kids
14 years ago
3 comments:
We just opened the pool too -- somehow worms got into it over the winter and their decaying bodies left a stain around the drain at the deepest part of the pool. That got hubby to throw a hissy fit about how life sucks: horror of horrors, we'll have to swim in a stained pool! Chronic pained people are soooo irrational... should I have mentioned starving children and such? I just walked away, as usual...
I am glad to hear the group is helping you, and that waitresses are hitting on you (trust me, they're not so attentive towards single women!)
Looking forward to hearing about the memorial.
-- the lounge queen
You are healing and you are quite normal ... it will be 7 years for me since Ted died and I can truthfully say there is not a day goes by that I don't think of me... time does make it bearable. Glad you opened the pool - now keep it up to Tami's standards! :)
Glad you are going to the memorial - Tami was/is a memorable gal and glad you are staying the country!
Blessings
Nanc
Norm: I really wondered if you would go back home, but good to know that you are staying here. I still think of Tammy almost daily too. don't think you have been hearing much from my sister Jackie. her son-in-law passed away last week. she has been in California for a while. have fun in the pool. there are times that I miss having a pool. Dale sure doesn't miss cleaning it though. Barb
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