My Candle Angels

As most of you know, I am a candle maker. This is the busiest time of year for me. This year isn't though because of my cancer... I have wonderful customers. Some of which I have known for years and many who I consider my friends. I have several gals that are taking my candles and selling them for me. What a gift of kindness huh? These ladies are the best. I still get to pour candles on my off chemo week and they so kindly take them and sell them. It's a huge bonus when you get to call your customers your friends as well. Thank you for being my special Candle Angels.. Kathy C, Brandi B, Laurie H, Rhondy R, Kelly S and Shari G. You gals are the best and you keep me feeling needed:)

I am feeling ok today. I resisted the urge to call and ask for my CT results about 20 times today. I will wait patiently until tomorrow and hope and pray he tells me there is some shrinkage of the tumors.

Tomorrow is chemo day, it almost feels like a good/bad because I know it is killing the cancer but it makes me feel so bad.

Is your butt covered?

Have you had a colonoscopy? If you haven't and are abover age 40, please get one. Use me for your example of what could happen. If only I would have had one 3 years ago.. I would be in much better health now.

The Dr's figure I have had cancer for 3-4 years. How can that possibly be? This is my thought for today. I have been pretty healthy, heck I lost 50 pound last year with diet and exercise, I was in the best health I have ever been in. Theres this little nagging voice in my head.. I should have listened to my body better. I had horrible pains in my right side off and on for maybe 2 years. I asked my Dr about them, but he said take gasex. Sheesh who was I to question him? Especially something as sensitive as discussing bodily functions. I just accepted what he said.
That was the ONLY symptom I had. Colon cancer is the number 2 cancer killer in the world and it is silent, no symptoms! How could I have been so foolish and not listened to my body better?
I had a colonoscopy at 37 for diarrea and the Dr declared me completely clean and told me to return in 10 years. I so wish I wouldn't have had a colonoscopy then and I would have waited til I was 41 or 42. Too many what if's to worry about now, but please listen to your body!

On the homefront,I went in for a CT scan today, this will tell us if the tumors are shrinking, I find out the news on Wednesday when I go in for Chemo. Thank you Sherry for taking me for chemo every two weeks. My family is wonderful!

It's abeautiful day in the neighborhood

After talking to a friend today, I decided I need to take this blogging a little more serious. She said people really want to know how I am doing so I think this is a great way to let everyone know.

I have finished 3 rounds of chemo. I am scheduled for wednesday for my next dose.
I am also scheduled for a CT scan tomorrow to see(pray, hope) that the tumors are shrinking. Although I hate the thought of going thru chemo again, I am happy that it is a option for me and glad that the poison they are putting in my body will kill every cancer cell in my body. I pray and hope for this every day.

I am so thankful for everyone that is taking such good care of me. I swear I don't know how my husband does it. I am not the easiest patient in the world and today he told me today was a no- crying day. Normally I would have told him where to stick his words, but today I know he just wants me to be happy today and so I will try to smile instead of cry just for him.. Chemo seems to have a crying effect and I can be totally fine and then bam, here comes the tears.

How my cancer journey began

Wow! I can't believe I am blogging about my journey to kick Cancers butt! I guess I have a lot of filling in to do since this marks too many weeks since I was diagnosed with colon cancer. I am not sure where to even begin.

I have been diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer with metasis to my liver, omentum, maybe even my kidney and lung. It doesn't sound pretty but my choice is to fight it like crazy!

The support of my family, friends, customers and complete strangers continue each day to amaze me! It is so hard to ask for help. I am the person that is their to help others, it feels so weird getting help from others...

August 26th was a day that would change my life forever... little did I even know how much. It was a busy weekend for my business. I had 4 parties scheduled, one friday, 2 saturday and one sunday. I just didn't feel well on Friday and by Saturday I was wondering how I would make it to Sundays party. My lower stomach just didn't feel right. I went to my candle party on Sunday but sat thru most of it, I just didn't feel well, by then My lower stomach was hurting. When I left the party and dropped off my daughter, I headed for the local promptcare center. They xrayed me and said I had some stool and gas and gave me stool softeners. I couldn't drive, my stomach just hurt so bad and I looked like I was 6 months pregnant.

I went home and was trying everything I could think of to feel better, luckily my daughter in law Kristi came over and she decided to call my Dr. He said for me to stop everything I was doing and head to the ER. Once at the ER, they gave me a massive dose of pain meds, I don't know what they were but I was out of it. They sent me for a ct scan and I faintly remembered them saying mass in my colon and spots on my liver and they were admitting me. Hubby went home to get some much needed rest and I was out of it with pain meds.. totally clueless for what was about to come.

About 7 am the next morning I was awoken by my Dr, telling me how sorry he was for the bad news they had given me. I was thinking huh, what are you talking about???? He then told me that they thought I had cancer. I also had a blood infection.

The next 4 days were a big blur, with tests and mixed thoughts from the Dr's. One would say it was cancer, the next would say they thought it was an infection. Even when the biopsy came back from the hospital, I was fed mixed reports. The nurse told me there was no cancer just dead cells. When I demanded to see a Dr, a few hours later a Dr came in and said yes it looks like cancer, but we don't know for sure so we are sending your biopsy to Mayo for further review. We were on a bad rollercoaster ride...

I was on clear liquids for 18 days as the local surgeon was ready to operate. On September 6, my local surgeon had the results back from Mayo... it was cancer. My world fell apart right there in his office. I don't remember much else about that day...except knowing I had to get another opinion and a good one at that.

I quickly went to Mayo for a second opinion on September 13th and they said I not only had cancer in my colon, but my liver, and my omentum. After more tests at Mayo, They said that in the three weeks since my original ct scan, my tumors had grown and I needed chemo and quickly, no surgery option YET.. notice I said yet? If these tumors will shrink down, I can get surgery which is the best option available.

I am currently on 5FU, yep that's what they call it, makes ya go hmm doesn't it? Along with Avistin and oxaliplatin. Chemos tough to get thru but not as tough as I am.